Dear Diary,

I saw in a magazine article today that the definition of a jeep, according to Bob Hope, is “a malted-milk machine that got drafter.” Really, Bob, I’d never have thought it of you. I really thought you had more pride than that.

There was a tribute to George Gershwin on the radio tonight. Some of the better known participants in the show were Bill Goodwin, Bing Crosby, Dinah Shore, Edward Arnold, the King’s Men, and Paul Whiteman and his orchestra. It was awfully good, and the King’s Men sang the most beautiful arrangement of “Bidin’ My Time” that I ever heard.

Dear Diary,

George Burns and Gracie Allen were on the Victory Parade radio show today. George asked Bill Goodwin to talk Gracie out of having some delayed wedding photographs made. Bill asked her if she didn’t want to go see Bob Hope’s new picture. She started crying and talking about how badly she wanted those pictures. She got Bill started, and he said, “I just thought you might like to see that new Bob Hope picture. (Sob!) He’s so funny. (Sob!) I just have to laugh every time I think of Bob Hope. (Sob!)” I still think Bob made a big mistake letting Bill Goodwin leave his show. He’s a comedian as well as an announcer.

Dear Diary,

I saw in the paper today that Frances Langford is going to be Bob Hope’s regular vocalist this season. I like her okay, but when Bob has a vocalist, he never does any singing himself, and that’s bad. He does little enough as it is, and when Judy Garland was his vocalist he did even less.

Bill Goodwin won’t be on the show next season. I wonder what they’ll do for drunkard roles.

Dear Diary,

The strangest think happened to me tonight. I was listening to the radio, waiting to hear “A Date With Judy.” It’s announced the same as Bob Hope’s program; that is, Bill Goodwin starts it by saying, “The Pepsodent show—.” I had forgotten that part thought, and it gave me quite a start. I thought for a moment that Bob Hope was back. (Only for a moment though. Darn it!)

Dear Diary,

Bob Hope’s guest tonight was Dizzy Daen. It was one of Bob’s best shows. They were talking about baseball players and Dizzy said, “Have you ever met my brother — Daffy?” Bob really did some fancy muffing tonight. He muffed one word three times and when he finally got that straight he started muffing another. The first time he said, “Wait a minute. I’ll come back.” About the fourth time he said, “That’s all right. Go ahead and talk to each other while we rehearse.” The last time he was talking to Bill Goodwin and he said, “You just read your lines tonight; I’m lousy.” As his solo tonight he sang “Alexander Is a Swoose.” The program will really be good next week because Bing Crosby will be Bob’s guest.