Dear Diary,

I called Betty Lou this morning, and she said that the short subject at the Rialto while I was at the farm was the “Hedda Hopper’s Hollywood” short subject that had Bob Hope’s radio program for April 28 in it. That’s the second time I’ve missed something about him recently. The third, and worst, came tonight after I got home from the show (and what a lousy show). I picked up the paper and read that two hours earlier Bob had been on a radio program called “Soldiers With Wings” with Jerry Colonna and various other Hope companions An he even sang a song! Oh, woe is me! My luck is getting awful.

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Dear Diary,

There was a picture of Bob Hope in the paper this morning in connection with the army-navy relief show. He and Jerry Colonna were holding suitcases, ready to leave.  But Bob had on the funniest looking clothes to be starting on a trip. It was an Arabian costume. I imagine the picture was taken on the set of “The Road to Morocco.” Bob looks rather nice in a turban. He should wear them more often. Then no one could tell him from a California woman—slacks and a turban. Wouldn’t he look cute chasing himself up Hollywood Boulevard, or down Vine Street? But the, doesn’t he always look cute? Well yes!

Dear Diary,

Bob Hope was so good tonight that I could never begin to say just how good, but I will try. Vera Vague was his guest, and he was broadcasting from the naval replacement center at San Pedro. Bob and Vera were talking about men (which lets Bob out) and Vera said, “I’d just love to get married and settle down in a cozy little home.” Bob said, “Why, Miss Vague, I’m touched. I’m deeply touched,” She said, “Oh, Mr. Hope, would you liek to be that man?” Bob replied, “I said I was touched, not tetched!” Naturally Bob said something about “My Favorite Blond.” Then he added quickly, “And I must remember to send Fred Allen his ninety-nine cents.” Colonna called Bob on the phone tonight to say, “I’ve just eloped with a showgirl and she’s turning in her uniform.” (A loud bang and some kissing) “A bubble dancer!” Everyone laughed so much after the bang that Bob said, “That last wasn’t needed.”

Dear Diary,

Robert Young was Bob Hope’s guest tonight. The two of them must have had a hard time remembering each other’s first names—they’ so very different, don’t you know.

Bob pulled some more gags about prices in hotels, only this time the hotel in question was in San Diego. Bob said, “For eight dollars they gave you a private room; for four dollars you shared a room with someone; for two dollars you could sleep in the lobby; and for fifty cents they let you sleep in the elevator. All night long I kept dreaming I was a yo-yo.”

Bob and Jerry naturally started one of their arguments about how to pronounce a word. Colonna said, “Hope, you’re a jass-ack.” Hope said, “You mean I’m a jack-ass.” Colonna replied, “For once I’m not going to argue with you.”

Dear Diary,

Betty Lou called tonight. She wanted to know if I had heard a certain commercial on the radio today, and I hadn’t, darn it. She said Bob Hope, Jerry Colonna, and Ben Gage did a two minute commercial for Bob’s book and Pepsodent. I don’t guess I missed so much, just two minutes, but it was Bob.

Dear Diary,

I got more pictures today of a mustachioed Bob Hope. He’s beginning to look like Jerry Colonna, and that will never do. Puh-lease, not that! From all these pictures of Bob wearing a big black mustache, I’m beginning to believe all anyone does in “Louisiana Purchase” is to wear the darn things. Let’s hope I’m completely wrong.

Dear Diary,

I bought a magazine today that had a review of “Louisiana Purchase” in it. There was a very cute picture of Bob Hope along with. He had on a false black mustached (He looked like Jerry Colonna.) and was looking over Zorina’s shoulder.

I didn’t think I was going to like the idea of Bob Hope and Zorina together, but according to this picture, she’s changed for the better since I last saw her.

Dear Diary,

I hadn’t intended to listen to Hedda Hopper today, but I just happened to turn on the radio just before shw cam on. Boy, was I glad I did. Bob Hope was her guest today instead of Wednesday. They were in Milwaukee for the American Legion convention. Hedda introduced Bob to the young mayor of Milwaukee and Bob said, “That handsome young fellow is the mayor? What is this, Boy’s Town?”

Jerry Colonna was on her program too. Bob and Jerry sure sounded good together.

Dear Diary,

I saw “Sis Hopkins” at the Texas today. There were a lot of my favorite people in the picture, including Jerry Colonna, Elvia (Cobina) Allman and Bob Crosby. Colonna should be right at home with Crosby because he (Colonna) used to play in brother Bing’s band, until Bob Hope got wind of him as a promising bit of stuff for comedy on Hope’s radio show.

Dear Diary,

In the morning paper there was a short article about Bob Hope’s deciding to use Colonna every week and Brenda and Cobina only every other week.

I sang in the Senior Chorus today at McFarlin Auditorium. It is the last day of the Greater Dallas Music Festival. We did pretty good and Miss Flagg said that she was proud of us. Mother said it was really beautiful, and she said it like she meant it.

Dear Diary,

Bob Hope’s guest tonight was Stuart Erwin. The show tonight was better than usual. He had time for everyting without hurrying a bit.

In the song interpretation Colonna was a medium. He told Bob to watch a table. Bob said, “But Colonna, how can that table move like that?” Colonna replied, “Underneath—a man from the finance company!”

Bob didn’t hit that high note again tonight but he said, “Patience, folks, I’ll do it some day.”

Dear Diary,

Bob Hope’s guest tonight was Preston Foster. The sang one short song together and Bob sang one solo. It was “The Reluctant Dragon.” They christened a new type hoke tonight. It’s sorta like, “You hadda open your big mouth.” Jerry was planting flowers in a lions den. Bob asked him if he wasn’t afraid. Colonna said, “Of course not. Lions eat vegetables.” Bob said, “No, they eat meat.” “Vegetables!” “Meat!” All of a sudden there was a lot of growling and roaring. Colonna said, “My, my, we learn something new every day, don’t we?”

Dear Diary,

Bob Hope’s guest tonight was Kate Smith. Tonight Bob talked about the changes on the radio dials. He went into a long explanation of it and used ten-inch words. After he finished he said, “That’s French for ‘Hope’s lousing up the air again.’ ”

I got robbed tonight. During Bob’s song version he and the rest of the gang were in a car going 125 miles an hour. Colonna was going to sail over a lake without touching the water. All I heard was a big splash and a lot of noise. Then the program was cut off. Gosh, how do I know Bob wasn’t killed?